The cause of an obituary is a time for reflection by both the obituary’s writer and its readers; it is a reminder of an uncertain future; it is about termination of a life.

When a colleague slips out of our midst quite unexpectedly, we are bound by way of published facts and testimony to reflect upon the past life of that colleague; but we are also likely to think a little bit more critically about ourselves and our use of time and talents. Indeed, as we grow older, we are progressively conditioned by the death of others to accommodate the reality of life’s one great inevitability. In turn; when we ourselves die – especially so if suddenly – we become part of the conditioning factor for others. If, however, we find ourselves avoiding such thoughts, or just not thinking at all, we may have missed some point of importance.

I am quite at home with such reflections in writing this obituary about Paul Darrington because he and I spent many hours in discussing the issues of some moment. Although our discussions were predominantly triggered by disputes and the means of settlement, they usually extended into the general matters of human relationships and attitudes. This was, of course, a natural development for most of our discussions because human relationships and attitudes are the heavy, and virtually unmoveable, foundation stones of many disputes.

In fact, it was Paul’s love of holding informal discussions with colleagues which first brought him into closer contact with me (mid-1988). Paul had written to the Branch Committee; he had an idea about small discussion groups meeting in Member’s houses; the topics were to be wide-ranging and the debates were to be easy-going so that Members could share their knowledge in an informal way. We (those of us on the Committee at the time) pounced upon Paul and invited him to join the Committee straight away – and what a good move that proved to be. Shortly after this, an announcement appeared in the Newsletter (N° 7, October 1988) by way of a letter to the Editor from Paul. Under the heading "I had a situation something like that" he explained his idea and invited Members to join a pilot meeting at his home in Carshalton. The pilot meeting was a great success and many more such meetings followed.

Paul demonstrated his ongoing interest in Branch activities and, on 19 April 1994, he was appointed Vice Chairman of the Branch. The following year Paul became Branch Chairman. But, I am passing over another major point: Paul took over, as team-leader, the Editorship of the Branch Newsletter and oversaw the publication of issue N° 23 in January 1994. He maintained his involvement in the Newsletter until his activities were brought to a close by his illness, which led shortly to his death on 5 June 2000.

Paul’s ability to work with others was demonstrated by his involvement in the Newsletter. When my period as Editor was coming to an end, there were several volunteers to take over as the new Editor. I met them all individually to discuss the work involved. All of those who were interested agreed to meet together at one of their houses and I was invited to attend. The upshot was, that after some discussion, all of the volunteers decided to work as a team and, more to the point, they did so. However, I expect the team members would acknowledge the focusing role played by Paul until handing over that baton to Peter Horne for the September 1996 issue. With the unfortunate illness of Peter Horne (now happily recovered), Paul stepped back into the pivotal role until the Editorship was taken over by David Bailey (our present Branch Chairman) who saw in the Newsletter published in January 1999.

Paul joined the Chartered Institute of Arbitrators in 1969 and he became a Member of the Panels in 1977, so he had a long involvement with the Institute, but we are predominantly concerned with his focus upon the South East Branch. One of the good things about a Branch Newsletter is that I can now suggest to the readers of this obituary that a look back over the issues of the Newsletter should re-awaken their memories of Paul’s involvement in the Branch activities, and also it should bring back a pleasant memory of all the interesting things undertaken by the Branch since Paul first took a seat on the Committee.

I shall miss all the informal discussions with Paul, and also the cuttings from the newspapers and other snippets of interest which he often sent to me.

As an architect; an arbitrator; and an expert, I am sure Paul’s death will leave a significant gap. As a family man, he is bound to be missed. As a Member of the Branch, we shall miss his presence as a good colleague at our meetings.